• Shilah Goin Goodbadmoms

Inadequate to Killing it | Inadequate Mom Vs. Confident Mom

From Inadequate

to Killing It!

Inadequate Mom


Confident Mom

Feeling inadequate? Too old? Too young? Too modern? Too old school? Too controlling? Too unorganized? Do you ever feel just not good enough? Simply inadequate for the mom life you want to lead?

I do! All the freakin’ time. Well, I used to way more than I do now! I’m not perfect...I still am human and deal with stupid thoughts. But the difference is I now recognizing the dumb thoughts as twisted truth taken out of context and I no longer believe them! You can too!

For so long I thought I was too young. When you become a mom at age 21 people unintentionally make me feel like a fool, like I was just winging this mom life. They'd say things like, “Oh, a baby raising a baby” and such. I bought into that lie for the first few years.

Then, once I was out of the breastfeeding stage, I started to feel too old. I felt out of touch with moms who had young babies. I thought I was too old to help or inspire anyone still in the diaper stage. I was officially too old (my kids were too old) for my local mommy meet up. I was no longer relevant. (Or so the lie I believed told me)

Next, I compared myself to anyone who was super organized. I AM NOT naturally organized! I can proudly say I have gotten better but at the time, I felt inadequate to run a smooth household. I’d double book myself all the stinkin' time. I’d then had to flake on someone and felt guilty and unfit for momming.

Thank God I have grown in confidence and now know I am GRACED to mom with God's help. Here’s what changed:

  1. I realized how loved I am! Unconditionally loved! God loves me so freaking much...even after losing my mind while yelling at the boy because the bloody shoe was still in the middle of the living room floor even after telling him 47 times to pick it up already. (It was literally bloody too)

  2. I realized that God is with me at all times so I can ask him for help and rely on him! A lot!

  3. I realized that God gave my three kids to me. Not to another mom but to me! And I’m pretty sure He knows what He’s doing. He knew I was capable to raise these sweet, sometimes annoying, angel babies. ​

  4. I realized that I can be confident in momming even when I’m not perfect because I’m confidently learning and that’s perfect! Never stop learning, never stop growing.

  5. I realized I am graced to mom. Graced means: unmerited divine assistance given to humans. Synonyms of graced are: distinguished, favored, enhanced, upgraded (picture a base model GMC vs. the blacked out Denali package! Yes please!), and elevated. I am a freakin rock star with all this going on!

Unconditionally loved:

1 John 4:19 NLT. We love each other because He FIRST loved us.

This says he first loved us. Before we could do anything to earn it he already loved us! He loves unconditionally! 1 John 4:16 NLT says, "God is love." It's literally who He is. He loves me and you so freaking much.

God is with me:

2 John 1:2-3 NLT. 2 because the truth lives in us and will be with us forever. 3 Grace, mercy, and peace, which come from God the Father and from Jesus Christ—the Son of the Father—will continue to be with us who live in truth and love.

He is forever and continually with us! He's even there when we wish maybe He wasn't there to see all our crazy. Thankfully He is there to help us, not judge us.

Gave my children me:

Psalms 127:3 NLT Children are a gift from the Lord; they are a reward from Him.

God doesn't re-gift! He picks out gifts with purpose directly for us. He is a pretty smart person so He knows what is going to work out for the best when it comes to giving us gifts. Let His wise choice bring you confidence.


Psalms 119:7 NLT. As I learn your righteous regulations, I will thank you by living as I should.

"As I learn".... If God didn't want us to continually learn and grow He would have popped us out of the womb with a brain full of geometry, sciencey stuff and all the other random crap we've learned (and maybe forgot again) over the years. But He didn't, He placed people in our lives to help us learn to speak and walk. He is still doing that for us! He will place people, opportunity and life experiences for us to continually learn. We don't have to be perfect but I believe we can constantly learn and that leads to confidence.


“All of this is for your benefit. And as God’s grace reaches more and more people, there will be great thanksgiving, and God will receive more and more glory.” 2 Corinthians 4:15 NLT

As God’s grace gets to more people He receives more glory! It’s literally for His benefit to grace you!

“And since it is by God’s grace, it can’t be a matter of their good works; otherwise, it wouldn’t be a gift of grace, but earned by human effort.”Romans 11:6 TPT

He gives His grace and it has absolutely nothing to do with me or you! Haha. "Well thanks God." But seriously, it’s a good thing! He gives me grace and He gets glory for it. We can’t earn or deserve it. It’s just a free gift! You can rock your grace gift during all the stages of momming!

If God be for me who can be against me? Or what can be against me? All the lies and dumb thoughts making me second guess my momming skills and feel inadequate can not stand against the truth of God’s love and grace! Lies of inadequacy can not stand against the truth that together with God, I am ENOUGH! You are enough! Let's start killing this mom life

I can and will rock this mom life with God on my side. You can too! Stop listening to the lies (even if the lies are semi-true, they are only twisted truth taken out of context) Start focusing on the fact that you are graced and unconditionally loved!

You are freaking Killing It, Mama!


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